The Lighter Side – This Week In Sport : Episode 8

Welcome to the another edition of ‘The lighter side – This week in Sport’, a weekly review show of all the goings on in the world of sport over the past week.
Before we get to the show,

a disclaimer: All the reports here are based on completely baseless unreliable sources. We only compile them and present it to you. If we catch hold of our reporters, we will sue them on your behalf.

On tonight’s show:
More trouble at the World Cup
Silly season
Pakistan captain-less
…In other news

 

More trouble at the world cup

With the world cup approaching in a fortnight, there seems to be no end to the debacles that seem to be happening in the world cup venues. In the most recent incident, a wall has collapsed in the M.A.Chidambaram stadium at Chepauk, Chennai. While it is only a compound wall and is not inside the stadium per se, the media have had a field day with headlines such as ‘The wall fall’ and ‘Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall; the wall had a great fall’. While they have not had much to chew on in terms of controversy since the CWG, the media have lapped it up with both arms. We contacted the ground officials and they were quick to point out that it was not a great thing and that too much was being made of it. ‘See, it was only a compound wall. There was a problem with the chemical actually. When we built the wall all those years ago, we were still arguing about the compound that the wall should be made of. I remember that I was part of that committee and I remember telling them that it would cause a chemical defect later but they did not listen to me at the time.’
Clearly, the officials are not to be deterred and have said, ‘The compound wall shall be put in place very soon. How are we so sure? Well, Mr. N.Srinivasan has promised us free bags of India Cements for the construction.’ When quizzed on the fact that the original wall itself had been using India cements, he said, ‘See, past is past and cement is cement.’ We’re still trying to evaluate the meaning of the cryptic message.
Meanwhile, there has been utter chaos at the ticketing counters, with only a single counter issuing tickets at many stadia. This has led to people standing in lines that have stretched into kilometers. When the BCCI was asked for a comment on this, they said, ‘We follow the model of the Indian railways – the single window system.’ The railways, however, meant that any counter could be used for any purpose. Clearly, the BCCI were taking the name a bit too literally.
Rumors are also rife that there is a major problem in the completion of the Wankhede in Mumbai, the venue that is slated to host the final. After the Eden Gardens debacle, the BCCI officials have been quick to point out that this is not the case. ‘The stadium in Mumbai is in perfect order. It is ready’, a spokesperson said. When asked which stadium in Munbai, the answer was, ‘the stadium.’ We leave it to the readers to interpret. Rumor has it, though, that Mr.Sharad Pawar has sweetened the deal for the ICC officials.

 

Silly season

January 31st , the final day of the January transfer window proved to be one of the most intriguing in recent times. Big money moves saw Fernando Torres move to Chelsea and Luiz Suarez and Andy Carroll moving to Liverpool.
Fernando Torres sealed his 50 million pound move from Liverpool to Chelsea. He was apparently disillusioned with his time in Liverpool and wanted to move to greater challenges. He even handed in a transfer request. Chelsea smelt blood and in true Marlon Brando style, Roman Abramovich made Liverpool, ‘an offer they couldn’t refuse.’ On being unveiled as Chelsea’s new number 9, he said, ‘I’m very happy to have signed for Chelsea. It has always been my dream to play for Chelsea.’ It may be remembered that on signing for Liverpool, Torres remarked, ‘It has always been my dream to play for Liverpool. They have been my boyhood club.’ Clearly, he has progressed to his manhood dream from his childhood one – Liverpool to Chelsea. Close associates of Torres, though, have told us that the striker wanted a change of scene. Said a source (who wishes to remain anonymous), ‘Nando wanted a change of scene. He’s played all his life in red and wanted to play in blue. Recently, he even started watching cricket and is enamored by the Indian cricket team in particular. He wants to be a man in blue. Also, he is a great fan of the captain, M.S Dhoni.’ When we approached Dhoni for a comment on this, he said, ‘well of course!’
Meanwhile, Luis Suarez finally completed his much prolonged move from Ajax to Liverpool for a sum in excess of 23 million pounds. Said Suarez, ‘It’s a dream come true. I’ve always wanted to play for Liverpool and it is like a dream come true.’ Yes, just like you, we’re also still looking for the folks who prepare these ‘new arrival’ speeches and reword them according to the player.
In one of the most bizzare transfers of the season, Andy Carroll has moved from Newcastle United to Liverpool for a sum of 35 million pounds, a sum that has left most people absolutely baffled. Balking at the price tag, fans have been left shocked. While they feel let down and betrayed by Carroll, they can’t help but feel that they’ve gotten a lot of money. Said one fan, ‘I’m gutted at the way he has left. He was such a cult hero here but he’s only played half a season in the premiership and he’s already worth 35 million? Well, I’ll take the money!’
The plot thickens though, with Carroll claiming that he was forced out of Newcastle and did not really want to leave. He sent text messages to his mate who worked in a newspaper which read, ‘gutted. Am being forced out.’ ‘Looks like I have to go. Unfortunate.’ These have created a lot of sympathy for Carroll but later in the day wikiLeaks has released an as yet un-read text which says ‘ha! Finally getting out of jail.’ While Carroll probably meant that he was no longer going to wear the jail-like outfit of Newcastle, this has evoked outrage among the Newcastle fans who are now praising Mike Ashley. One of them said, ‘Mike Ashley is great. We thought he was like Scrooge – miserly but we know that he has done a good bit of business. Looks like our Christmas Carroll came slightly late.’ Clearly, there is no shortage of puns in the Dickensian Geordie region.

 

Pakistan still skipper-less

With the world cup barely a fortnight away, the Pakistani team is yet to know who will lead them out for their first game at the world cup. The selectors are yet to decide on a captain for the world cup. While the current ODI captain, Shahid Afridi seems to be the prime candidate, the test captain, Misbah-Ul-Haq seems to be in the running for the ill-fated job. ‘This is a very difficult choice to make. While on one hand, Misbah’s frank attitude and catch dropping skills are hard to overlook, Afridi stakes a strong claim with his ball eating ability. It is a very difficult task to choose between the two.’, said the chairman of selectors. Meanwhile, there have been radical suggestions about multiple captaincy. Greg Chappell, it seems, has been appointed for this purpose. ‘We are currently not ruling out any possibility. We are exploring the multiple captaincy theory as well. We’ve appointed Greg Chappell as a consultant on these matters and we will come to a consensus very soon. We shall soon fix the captaincy’, he said. The press was asked to not read much into the ‘fix’ part.

Meanwhile, it has emerged that the Pakistan team is on a high after trouncing New Zealand in the One day series. ‘Yes, we have been playing well but it is the world cup that counts. Beating New Zealand is not that big a deal. It is the fourth game of the World cup that is most crucial for us. I don’t know who it is against but it is most crucial.’, said Afridi. In case you were wondering, Pakistan’s fourth game is against New Zealand. Afridi certainly stakes a claim for the ‘brightest’ captain.

 

…In other news
A sudden protest burst out in Sri Lanka. The reason was a classic case of mistaken identity. Trying to mirror their counterparts in Egypt, sympathizers of the anti-government protesters in Egypt staged an impromptu protest on the streets of Colombo. Their target: Jehan Mubarak, the Sri Lankan cricketer. ‘We are outraged at the events unfolding in Egypt and are compelled by duty to do something. This is what we will do!’, said a protester. ‘So what if his first name is not Hossni? He’s still a Mubarak!’, justified another. While Jehan has been left speechless and wondering what he has done wrong, the people are in no mood to give up. Rumor has it that president Obama has called up this Mubarak as well and asked him to step down from his post as soon as possible.

 

Brushing aside questions of his inclusion in the world cup side, Piyush Chawla has come out fighting and has said, ‘I’ve proved myself many times in the past. I’m a class performer. No one can doubt that. Hence I deserve to be in the squad. I have proved in the past and I will prove it again.’ Fans, though, are still not in the least convinced of the selection. ‘He’s proved,eh? And he will prove again, eh? Well, I bet he’s talking about proving the Pythogoras theorem. I know that he failed his class XII exam and has one coming up again soon. I bet he’s talking about proving this.’

 

Meanwhile, Harry Redknapp, manager of Tottenham Hotspur football club has revealed how he failed in a 35 million pound bid for Giuseppe Rossi of Villareal. ‘We tried to get him but we couldn’t. We put in a bid for him and also Sergio Aguero.’ Just when he thought he had finished, he went on, ’…and Samuel Eto’o and Lionel Messi and Karim Benzema and Gonzalo Higuain and ..’ Due to a lack of time, and because we were to cover another event, we had to leave at that point in time. However, we have it from good sources that his recital of his striker bids is still going on. We hope to catch it soon and will report back to you.

 

The West Indies cricket team has been facing a strange phenomenon off late. All their matches seem to get rained off. Be it in Sri Lanka, England or the West Indies itself, the West Indian team just seems to be unable to complete a one-day match. ‘This is perpetrated by the ICC. They are afraid that the West Indies will become a powerhouse again and win everything. Also, we are seriously thinking of suing the weather. We have formed a strong case and we shall soon be moving to court against global warming itself.’, said a spokesperson of the West Indies cricket board. Not everyone, however, is convinced that it is the weather gods who are responsible. ‘I think it is the IPL that we should blame. Ever since Chris Gayle went to the IPL, he became a big fan of numerology and suddenly dropped the ‘y’ from his name. He is now “Gale” and of course, when there is gale, there is rain.’

 

That’s it from this week’s bulletin. We hope you enjoyed it. Until next time, its good bye from us …

The Lighter Side – This Week In Sport : Episode 5

Welcome to the another edition of ‘The lighter side – This week in Sport’, a weekly review show of all the goings on in the world of sport over the past week.
Before we get to the show,

a disclaimer: All the reports here are based on completely baseless unreliable sources. We only compile them and present it to you. If we catch hold of our reporters, we will sue them on your behalf.

On tonight’s show:

The Commonwealth Games Village

A bridge collapses, and so does a ceiling

Yuvi dropped

Mr.Butt

In other news …

The Commonwealth Games Village

With barely 10 days to go for the start of the commonwealth games, the latest complaint has come in. This time, it is regarding the state of the living facilities. The New Zealand team is apparently unhappy with the state of the living conditions provided to their athletes. Said a spokesperson, ‘the living conditions are deplorable. Back home in New Zealand, we live in style. We provide all our guests with great accommodation but the ones provided to us are sub-standard. Here there are leaky toilets, unclean toilets and there is even one toilet with no toilet at all, just a hole.’ We told him that it was what we called an ‘Indian style toilet’ and he said, ‘Oh!’ When asked what major sporting event New Zealand has hosted in the past, the spokesperson confidently said, ‘The All New Zealand World Kiwi fruit eating championship.’

Also there were found to be faeces in the living quarters. Officials were nonchalant about this, shrugging it off indifferently saying, ‘Shit happens.’ Also, there were found dogs sleeping on the beds in the rooms. The officials were of contrasting opinions when quizzed on the subject. Some said that since a dog is a man’s best friend, it was entitled to this luxury. Others said that it was a sort of a trial run before the real thing. Maneka Gandhi is apparently incensed by the whole incident and has called for a ban on animal testing.
Meanwhile, before anyone could point fingers at Mr.Kalmadi, he came out and defended himself. ‘See, I told the government right at the beginning.’, he said, ‘I told them that for a games of this magnitude, building a games village would not suffice. I told them that we ought to build a games city or at the very least, a games town but they flatly refused my proposal. See now what has happened!

The officials-in-charge, however, were in denial. ‘It’s the fault of the rains. We had nothing to do with it. I promise you that we took all the precautions necessary. How were we to know that it would rain this heavily? I mean, we are not meteorologists.’ When asked why they had not consulted meteorologists, they responded, ‘the Indian met department is highly unreliable. But on second thought, we should have consulted with them. Maybe then, we could have blamed it on them.’

10 minutes later, an official press announcement was issued in which the meteorological department of India was blamed for not predicting the rain and that if India failed to deliver a good commonwealth games, rain would be banned from entering Delhi for the next 10 years. This was signed by Suresh Kalmadi.

A bridge collapses, and so does a ceiling

In yet another debacle, a foot over-bridge that was built collapsed just outside the sports complex injuring 23 people. Commonwealth games officials were left red-face with regards to the whole incident. They were quick to redress the situation though. Said an official, ‘yes, this has been a calamity of sorts but it’s not the end of the world. After all, it’s only an overbridge. That being said, we have decided to probe further into the matter. As of now, we squarely blame Jaypee cements. Clearly, their promise of ‘Andhar se solid’ was a lie. We have launched an inquiry into the matter and I am sure that we will get the results soon.’ We pointed out that they did not actually use Jaypee cement to which he answered, ‘So what?’

Meanwhile, while this was fresh in the memory, another embarrassing event occurred. A part of the false-ceiling in the weightlifting arena collapsed, leaving the organizing committee even more red-faced. When the officials were asked about this, they had a ready reply. ‘We were given a mandate to cut costs. Hence, now we figure that we don’t have to actually buy the weights. The athletes will be asked to life the parts of the ceiling itself. We are proud of this ingenious idea.’ ‘Also’, they added, ‘what is this fuss you are making? I don’t understand it. After all, it was only a false ceiling that collapsed. If it were the real ceiling, then there is cause for concern but since it’s only a false once, there is no harm done.’

Delhi Chief Minister, Ms.Sheila Dixit has come out in the media and appealed to the people to support the games. ‘Don’t look at minor glitches such as these. Look at the beautiful stadia that we have built for the games’, she said. ‘These setbacks have been bad, no doubt but there is room for optimism yet. On the bright side, we now have an open air stadium and can say that it is a rival to the Colosseum of Rome.’

Floods have ravaged Uttar Pradesh and more than 200 villages have been severely affected but apparently, the worst affected has been the CWG village in Delhi.

Yuvi dropped

The team for the upcoming test series against Australia has been announced and the most shocking news has been the omission of Yuvraj Singh. Debutant, Cheteshwar Pujara gets a callup in his place. Yuvraj was obviously disappointed. Said he, ‘Ya of course I am disappointed but in this stage of my life, disappointments are routine. In Sri Lanka, I scored a century and then a fifty but if that is not good enough, then I can’t help it.’ He added, ‘Yeh bhag dhod waali life mein thakna manaa hai. I am going to have 5 ReVital tablets each day. Then I can “jiyo jee bharkke.”‘ Clearly, the advertising money has been well spent.

Meanwhile, when the selectors were asked about the reason for this change, they said that it was a fitness issue. ‘You have seen that ReVital ad? That was the extent to which Yuvi is fit. Unfortunately, he can run only about 12 seconds on the treadmill. That is one of the main reasons for which he has not been included. I am sure that he will play domestic cricket and regain his form’, chairman of selectors, Kris Srikkanth told us. He added, ‘Right now, his form is not good. When all the other members of the squad are lean and rectangular, he is oval, with a pronounced mid-section and protruding belly. This form should improve.’ On the inclusion of the uncapped Pujara, he said, ‘Ya, the boy has been doing very well in the domestic circuit. See, also we are a very religious nation so a prayer, or Puja in the squad will also help us a lot.’

Mr. Butt

Mr. Ijaz Butt, chairman of the PCB has been hogging the limelight this past week with comments against the England Cricket Board (ECB) and the English players. After Pakistan won the third one-day against England, Mr.Butt came out and said, ‘It’s all a sham. These England players have been paid to lose to Pakistan. You are all blaming only the Pakistani cricketers of fixing matches but these England players are doing it too. I mean, see, the Pakistan players have decided to lose but in spite of that, if they still win, what does that show?’

When asked about the possibility of Pakistan actually playing well enough to win, he said, ‘What are you talking about? Pakistan has decided to lose. All the payments have been made. Didn’t you see the video?’ So when we asked him whether this proved that the Pakistan players were guilty, he said, ‘No! Of course not. I only made a reference to the video to emphasize that Pakistan players took money but I’m not saying that they were involved in any fixing. But I must say that England do fix matches.’ Needless to say, no one except Mr.Butt himself understands what he says.

The ECB has taken a grim view of these comments and has threatened to sue Mr.Butt. To these reports, he replied, ‘Ha! No problem I always welcome such stupid ideas. Besides, I am due for a wardrobe change now. So I welcome any sewing. It will at least save me the cost of going to a tailor to get my sewing done. Once they are done with sewing, I will sue them. See, I am very clever that way. Ha!’ Also, he launched an astonishing attack on the ICC. ‘The ICC are also involved in this match fixing. They know it is happening and yet are not doing anything about it. The CEO should be sacked. I am willing to put my name in the hat to be the next CEO. I will make sure that the ICC is run properly.’ We asked him if he knew the full-form of the acronym ICC to which he replied, ‘Of course! The International Corruption of Cricket! I am fully qualified to run it.’ He added finally, ‘Cricket is broken. Pakistan is trying to fix it. Please give them the credit they deserve.’

In other news …
West Indian cricket legend, Sir Garfield Sobers, this week, claimed that Shane Warne was not the greatest leg-spinner of all time. ‘Warne is undoubtedly a great spinner but he is not the greatest. I say this simply because he did not have a great googly to go with the spin. He was a great turner of the ball but his googly was nothing great. I feel that Subhash Gupte was better than him.’
Warne brushed off the remark saying, ‘Sir Gary is one of the greatest cricketers and I respect him immensely but I think he must have made this remark when he was drunk.’
Sir Gary retorted, ‘Everyone knows that I am a teetotaler. With a name such as ‘Sober’, how can I possibly be drunk?’

The Airtel Champions League T20 is heading towards its finale with the conclusion of the group stages. With Chennai Super Kings and Royal Challengers Bengaluru reaching the semi-finals, most cricket fans are not too sure if the IPL2 is still going on. Remarked one fan, ‘IPL2 was in South Africa; this is on South Africa. CSK and RCB made it to the semis then; they have made it to the semi-final now. What is the difference?!’
Meanwhile, The Mumbai Indians crashed out of the tournament and skipper, Sachin Tendulkar has spoken out against the fresh auctions ahead of IPL4. ‘We have worked hard in building the team and now, suddenly we have to be disbanded. This cannot be good for the game.’ With the teams allowed to retain only 4 players (only 2 foreigners), and the Mumbai Indians looking to retain the services of the West Indian duo of Pollard and Bravo, and Sri Lankan pacer, Lasith Malinga, the Mumbai Indians think tank has come up with an idea. ‘We have decided to cleverly bypass this rule of retaining only 2 foreign players. Mumbai is in West India. So we are going to change the name of our franchise to Mumbai West Indians. In doing this, Bravo and Pollard will become local players since they are West Indians anyway. Then we can keep Lasith Malinga as well!’

That’s it from this week’s bulletin. We hope you enjoyed it. … Until next time, its good bye from us …

The Lighter Side – This Week In Sport : Episode 4

Welcome to the another edition of ‘The lighter side – This week in Sport’, a weekly review show of all the goings on in the world of sport over the past week.

Before we get to the show,
a disclaimer: All the reports here are based on completely baseless unreliable sources. We only compile them and present it to you. If we catch hold of our reporters, we will sue them on your behalf.

 

On tonight’s show:

  • The Micromax cup
  • Something fishy about Vishy
  • CWG pullout
  • Tiger Woods gets divorced
  • Wasim Akram

 

The Micromax cup
India played 2 matches in the micromax cup this past week with mixed results. While they lost to Sri Lanka in what was their worst ever defeat in terms on balls remaining, they beat New Zealand comprehensively to reach the final.

The first match was marked by a dismal batting performance with India all out for 103. This was not short of controversy though. When India were at  99-9, TV replays showed that Suraj Randiv tried to slyly slip in a no-ball to deny India a century. Yet, Team India managed to bat beautifully and made a brilliant century. After reaching the milestone, the players collectively held their bat aloft to acknowledge the cheers.

The second game saw a reversal in fortunes for team India. They made only a half decent 223 but bowled New Zealand out for 118, thereby reaching the Micromax cup final. India had New Zealand on the ropes at 43-6 but were hit back by a whirlwind half century by Kyle Mills. ‘The way he was swinging the bat, he was like a windmill’, remarked Dhoni at the post match press conference. When asked what the final will be like, he replied with a grin, ‘nothing like anything!’ When Ross Taylor was quizzed about the dismal effort of his team, he replied in true Micromax fashion, ‘we’re really sorry.’ The sponsors, Micromax, are truly getting their money’s worth.

Meanwhile, regional divides within India suddenly, inadvertently took an upturn during the India-New Zealand game when Tim Southee bowled to Virender Sehwag. Since Sehwag is from Delhi, it was clearly a case of a Southee  vs Nothee. Thankfully, however, this did not escalate into full scale violence as both the Southees and the Northees alike turned their wrath in the direction of the hapless Ravindra Jadeja, who seems to be taking flak from all directions.

 

Something fishy about Vishy
Vishwananthan Anand, India’s most recognizable chessman and current world champion has been denied a honorary doctorate which was to be conferred upon him in the ongoing International Congress of Mathematicians (ICM). The doctorate was to be conferred by the Central university of Hyderabad (UoH). When permission was sought by the Executive Organizing Committee (EOC) of the ICM, the Ministry of HRD(MHRD) apparently denied permission questioning Anand’s Indian-ness, since Anand is an NRI living in Spain. They said that there was some clearance that was required for further processing.

The matter was to be sent to the President for approval but never was. The MHRD is understood to have not wanted to burden the President from her already packed schedule. A schedule that comprised of, among other important activities like flying fighter planes and posing for excellent photo ops, attending the ICM.

Anand is understood to be hurt by this and was reportedly overheard as saying, ‘I want my country back.’ Kapil Sibal, Union HRD Minister, has since called up and apologized to Anand. ‘It was an oversight’, he said, ’one that never should have happened but it’s all sorted out now. Vishwananthan Anand will be conferred the honorary doctorate very soon. In compensation, I would like to personally exempt Anand from taking the class 10 and 12 board exams and would also like to give him 5 free passes to exams that he or any family member of his can show to get the exams waivered off.’

Anand, however, is not too sure of all this gestures. We hear that he is taking lessons from Sanjay Dutt and Raju Hirani on how to become a doctor, a la, Munnabhai MBBS. Two Hindi movie fans were overheard discussing the whole controversy: ‘Pardes’, accused one. ‘Phir Bhi Dil Hai Hindustani’ pleaded the other. Looks like Anand felt like Mr.India – invisible.

 

CWG pullout
Yet another week, yet another setback. This seems to be the theme of these Commonwealth Games. After all the controversies surrounding the games, it is now time for controversies on it. Many of the top athletes have pulled out of the games citing their packed schedule as the reason. Whether it is this or whether they feel the games are not quite important enough, is anyone’s guess. Schedules of major international events like cycling world championships, tennis masters series and athletic events clash with the CWG.

The tennis team of India is also threatening to pull out because of unpaid dues. Said Mahesh Bhupathi, ‘I’ve been sending taxi and hotel bills for reimbursement but I’ve so far not got anything.’ The All India Tennis Association (AITA) says that it has forwarded the claims to the ministry and asked them to pay $115 in compensation per say. When contacted, the ministry officials say that since the players did not use the ‘fasttrack’ services, they would not be reimbursed.

Meanwhile, unlike she stated on this show last week, Stephanie Rice has indeed decided to undergo shoulder surgery and will miss the CWG. When asked about her fondness for basmati that she gave as a reason for wanting to come to India, she had a one word reply this time as well: ‘Import’.

Mr. Suresh Kalmadi was asked what he felt about this latest fiasco. He brushed it off and said that it didn’t bother him too much. ‘So what if these stars are not coming? We have plenty of stars. In October, the Delhi skies are very clear and we can get to see a lot of stars. Not only stars, constellations as well. And during the day, the brightest star, the sun, is also very much visible. So it’s not a problem at all.’ Clearly, Mr.Kalmadi has a very firm grasp on the situation, and indeed a sound knowledge of astronomy.

 

Tiger Woods gets divorced
Tiger Woods, after months of scam and speculation, finally laid to rest the entire philandering saga by signing on the dotted line and getting divorced from Elin Nordegen. The divorce finally went through on Monday. After the divorce, Elin spoke out for the first time and said, ’I felt like my whole world had fallen apart. I loved him. We had so much fun and I felt safe with him.’ She felt safe with him and now we have learned that she has ordered a state-of-the-art safe to store the proceeds from the divorce. The divorce settlement is rumored to be in the region of $100 million USD.

Tiger Woods, when interviewed, said that he was saddened by the entire ordeal. When asked what his immediate plan was, he smiled hopefully and said, ‘birdies.’ We assume he meant the golfing kind.

 

Wasim Akram
The Pakistani fast bowling great, Wasim Akram was caught up in a row with Indian skipper, M.S.Dhoni over his comments about Indian fast bowlers being ‘softies.’ He was referring to the bowlers not being fit enough. M.S.Dhoni apparently heard only half of this and launched into a strong defence of his bowlers. ‘We are not softies’, he said. ‘If anything, we are more of a team of Frostiks and Cornettos. There are even some of these players who have grown up loving Max Fun Orange and Fun Joos but to call us softies is preposterous.’

When Wasim Akram clarified that he was indeed talking about the fitness of the bowlers, Dhoni retracted his criticism and said that he had spoken in the heat of the moment. ‘You know, when we speak in the heat of the moment, we say things that we don’t really mean.’ He even joked, ‘In the heat of the moment, the softie is most likely going to melt.’ ‘But in all seriousness’, he continued, ‘ even our bowlers are not softies. We may have the occasional Sundae on our Sunday off but not a softie by any means.’

 

That’s it from this week’s bulletin. We hope you enjoyed it. Until next time, its good bye from us …